Gratitude day 7

I'm having a harder time being grateful for something today. It was a little rougher of a day today. It started out not bad at all. There was no school today so when the kids woke up at exactly 7:00am on the dot like they do virtually everyday, I gave them my phone to watch Netflix for a bit. And then I actually fell asleep again until 7:48 when I heard Lexie wake up. We had a quick breakfast, I took a fast shower, threw on some mascara, everyone was good, to take Lexie to her 1 year check up. That went well. Then we were going to drive to Orem to doTERRA's will call because somehow I messed up on my order this month and didn't save it right or something so there were several things I needed and didn't get mailed to me. And that went just fine. We were almost to our exit when I saw the gas light turn on. I unzipped the diaper bag to get out my wallet AND IT WASN'T THERE. I immediately remembered/realized I left it in OREM. Holy Crap. And I needed gas. And I didn't have my wallet. And I needed gas. AND I DIDN'T HAVE MY WALLET. Holy Crap again! I semi panicked a little. Found out they still had my wallet. Decided to go home for lunch because the kids needed it. Big Mark loaned me $40 to go get gas. And then we all drove to Orem and back AGAIN. The kids were not so happy about this. Everyone was definitely on edge. (Side note, I need a car diffuser. Like, bad.) Holy. Crap. So now that it was about 2pm and we hadn't done nearly anything that I wanted, so we started to clean up the toys downstairs. It was going to be a big job because everything was all over the place and hadn't been properly put away in a long time. And yes, it was a big job. We finished at 4:45 after I said to Nora 465,132 times "Focus on the Legos. Just pick up one Lego at a time and put it in the bucket." She only dropped the bucket 4 or 5 times and had to keep re-picking up all the pieces again. But, Man Oh Man, does the toy closet look good. It hasn't looked that good for a long time. It was team work. They really did help (a little). So then I started making dinner at 5:00. We usually eat at 5 or shortly there after. And then I realized that the cereal bowls were still in the sink. And the counter hadn't been wiped off since probably last night. Lexie was fussy because she was hungry. Nora came up asking to eat everything because she was hungry. Then the chicken took 20 minutes longer than the recipe said to cook. Emotions were very heightened. And I was trying hard to not have a breakdown. Everybody ate, I quickly tried to help clean up at least a little, then we all came downstairs for a sleep over. We got Frozen and Planet 51 from the library on Wednesday. The kids were in their jammies, there were no toys on the floor, blankets were ready, and we are all sleeping down here tonight. Well, not Lexie, or Corey because he's gone.

Now that I have gotten that off my chest, I'm actually getting a flood of things I am thankful for.
1. Yesterday afternoon I found 6 beads in the middle of Lexie's poopy diaper. She had swallowed them. Then pooped them out. No fussing, no struggle, no signs of anything. I found her playing with a broken necklace yesterday morning. Not all the beads had fallen off the string yet. So I grabbed it and was looking all around (mind you, among the toys, this was before our big clean up today) and didn't see any beads anywhere. This probably should have been a sign to me but I just shrugged it off and took the necklace away. Oh, the things that could have happened... *cringe*
2. Everyone's emotions were very heightened today. And we still ended the night semi-ok. Granted, we didn't read scriptures or say family prayer, or read any stories at all. We watched 2 movies, Nathan fell asleep during the second and Nora fell asleep right after, but right now I am going to try to not guilt myself by focusing on the things I didn't do. Instead, my kids still wanted to sit by me for a least part of the movie. We hugged. We laughed at Lexie. Our hard day got shrugged off. And now they are sleeping peacefully right by me. I can hear their breathing across the room and Lexie's music through the baby monitor.
3. Tomorrow is a new day. It really is. We can start fresh. I can choose to be happy (I say that to my kids all the time and now I'm saying it to myself...) I may feel over worked, overwhelmed, lacking in nearly everything, and seriously craving some 'me' time or a break or a chance to pee without someone watching me, but I am going to try to smile more tomorrow. We'll see how that works.